Review: Chernobyl Diaries


Following the success of the relentless ‘Paranormal Activity’ franchise it is no surprise that anybody, from producer to grip handler, involved in that project is likely to branch out and create a ‘by the creators of Paranormal Activity’ movie of their own. The producers in this case, take their movie to the Ukraine, to Pripyat, the ghost town nearest to the nuclear reactor disaster site, and deliver us a movie so fucking boring simply reviewing it is sending me to sleep.

The plot might as well have been drawn up and scripted on the plane ride from the United States as, simply put, a group of 4 or 5 persons join up to a less than legit trip into the controlled zone. Bypassing police checkpoints and ignoring the usual ‘no entry’ warnings the group push on, until of course their van is sabotaged by persons unknown and they are stuck there. Nightfalls and they come under attack, and sure enough one by one the group is whittled down. Textbook, and certainly less than inspired in today’s modern cinema.

The main mystery should come from whom, or what is attacking them, but two things hamper this movie right from the get go, killing off any hope of it being any good within the first half an hour. Number one, it’s obviously mutant people a la ‘Wrong Turn’- mystery solved - and number two, it’s so dark constantly you hear the group screaming, but at what is anyone’s guess.

Characters, unlikable and irritating, script, bland and cliché and gore minimal and forgettable.
Not much left to go on is there?

The only positive aspect of this movie is simply that the parts of the movie filmed in Pripyat in the day are authentic, and it is interesting to see what was left behind after the nuclear disaster.

Overall though the ‘Chernobyl Diaries’ is a poor, poor effort. The low certificate may make it accessible to a more tolerable audience, but those of us with a choice, leave this on the shelf. It’s shit.

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