Review: The Hills Have Eyes (2006)


A remake of the Craven original which, in all fairness, suffers from the same flaws as it, despite being a reasonably good idea, the movie is generally pretty poor on content.

The plot is far too simple and, to be honest, I really am surprised that the writers couldn’t come up with more of a story when deciding to remake the movie. Basically, a family gets given some dodgy directions from an equally dodgy gas station worker which leads them into the middle of butt-fuck nowhere. When their truck and trailer gets stinger stripped the family are stranded and soon become under attack from mutants living in the hills. After the initial attack the survivors seek revenge against their carnivorous assailants.

Soooo basic, and when you consider that the movie is around 1 hour 50 in length there is a fuck load of padding needed to fill out the time. Basically this is the usual sort of film which can be split into two sections: Gore, which is obviously the good bit and the ‘character development’ which is both slow and boring.

For the first hour of this film you will be bored senseless as very little happens, the family just get stuck and then there is some less than witty banter. Ironically, there is more development of the plot explained in the title sequence, which explains about the effects of nuclear testing in the 1950s, than in the first hour of the film.
Thankfully the second half of the film is much more pleasing, as it’s pretty much all gore.

Once the gore gets going it’s actually both intense and brutal. Whilst there is little in the way of torture the killings are generally bloody and there are many different ways used to dispatch various human and mutant members of the cast. The effects are wicked and the camera work, especially during several of the hand to hand sequences, makes the action seem all the more impacting. As this was clearly a high budget production (within limits of course) the prosthetics used all look quite convincing and, to top it off, the camera does not shy away from the more gruesome impalements, dismemberments and executions (well not in the unrated version anyway!). The body count is fairly high too which is good.

Well, that pretty sums up my review. Overall this movie is not going to fool anyone! If there ever was a movie which was simply an excuse for gore this is it. The story is shit, the gore is not bad, but god that was a long first hour! I love gory movies but I hate waiting for it, and once this movie finished I was quite glad – watched it in two parts too! There are much better, this is simply generic.

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